


could've, should've..

by saccharineflower



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-05
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:42:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26305801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saccharineflower/pseuds/saccharineflower
Summary: Kyungsoo tiptoed but arriving at the final destination made him think that he should've ran.
Relationships: Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Kim Jongin | Kai
Comments: 7
Kudos: 12





	could've, should've..

**Author's Note:**

> kaisoo angst, everyone. 🙂🔫
> 
> hello? I'm back, I guess? 🙂
> 
> also, as always, i didn't bother proofreading 😭 I might end up deleting the whole story if i did 😭 pls ignore the grammatical errors 😭

Kyungsoo should've seen this coming. He must be comfortable seeing, getting used to Jongin being around.

" _Hyung, you should buy another couch!_ ", Jongin had told him about three months ago.

Jongin was pouting, had swinging his long and soft skinned legs on the couch's arm rest; looking at him with such familiar furrow on his short, thick but pretty eyebrows.

" _I will_ ," he answered.

That was three months ago.

•

Kyungsoo stares at the newly delivered couch, the lingering scent of mint from the airconed furniture shop sticks at soft fabric cover.

"Why did you purchase the one with the extra cover?" Chanyeol asks, emerging from the kitchen, munching on some cold nuggets the taller doesn't bother to heat up.

"Kyungsoo is so expensive~" Baekhyun singsongs, corners of his lips downwards as he follows Jongdae who looks too happy carrying a tray of newly heated potato fries.

Kyungsoo watches as Baekhyun takes off the soft fabric, silk of all cotton, from the couch. He snickers when his friend makes a face. He didn't even complain when Baekhyun ended up throwing the new couch cover on the marble floor.

"Damn!" Baekhyun exclaims. "That fucking static!"

It's Jongdae who picked up the soft cloth, folding it thrice and hangs it on one forearm.

"Be nice, okay? It took us like.. two years to force Kyungsoo to throw that beat up couch," Jongdae half shouts in his whiny voice, his words resonating at Kyungsoo's place as he saunter towards the latter's room.

"Kyungsoo-yah! I put it on your bed!" Jongdae tell him after coming back from his room.

"Yeah." Kyungsoo then breathes. "Help me put this somewhere comfortable."

Jongdae and Baekhyun shrugs, the latter wiggling his shoulders making Jongdae laugh at Baekhyun's attempt of warming up. Kyungsoo snorts, deep chuckle coming out of his lips.

Chanyeol is the only one looking conflicted when he's the one who should be more helpful because Chanyeol is that hungry for a clap on the back. But he's frowning at Kyungsoo.

"Why can't you just put it where your old couch used to?" The taller man asks in confusion.

Jongdae and Baekhyun are too busy bickering and Chanyeol is too oblivious of how his question inflicted Kyungsoo that they failed to notice him halting, eyes not blinking and just.. stare for a couple of seconds, maybe a _couple_ _more_ of seconds because it was hard for Kyungsoo to act like he remembers _nothing_.

Later that day, Kyungsoo bids his friends bye with packed dinner as compensation for taking their precious time, like annoying friends they are.

But no matter how annoying Baekhyun, Jongdae, and Chanyeol get, they're the best people Kyungsoo keeps around.

Because they never mention nor ask about Jongin.

And for that, Kyungsoo is happy.

•

It's one of those nights.

Those nights where Kyungsoo is having trouble finding sleep. Instead, he breathe, rhythmic, stares at the ceiling of his room despite only having the moonlight giving close-to-dim light.

He breathes, stable and calm. As if his mind isn't drowning with questions he kept at the deepest part of his mind.

Kyungsoo wonders.

He wonders if he only waited, would everything turn different?

If he only let Jongin took the pace, would everything be still the way they are? Or would they change?

Kyungsoo thinks that his sea of questions can't get drown. His sea of questions won't get drowned on his ocean of questions, questions that he kept too long it went down too deep.

He wonders.

He wonders if secretly Baekhyun, Jongdae, and Chanyeol talk about _it._ They sure does. But they're considerate enough to not talk about if in front of him.

They also must be talking about it rarely, by the way Chanyeol never realized his own question earlier.

Kyungsoo blinks his eyes. Sleep isn't coming.

He wonders if Jongin is sleeping right now.

Is he sleeping on a bed? On a futton layed on the floor? Or on a couch?

Jongin loved his couch. The one with that tattered leather main cover. The one where Jongin sometimes get his scratches for moving too much.

Kyungsoo wonders how does it feel not getting hurt at the thought of still having that old couch, with Jongin in between his thighs on a movie night; his fingers combing the soft strands of Jongin's hair.

Kyungsoo wonders if he only confessed his feelings verbally, instead of fucking Jongin and whispering sweet nothings and only doing them on impulse... maybe, things will be different.

It was hard. Dealing with his feelings for Jongin. Because the amount of his urge to him he love him is the same amount of his discourage. And he thought, ge fucking thought that taking advantage of Jongin's lack of barrier for one night is enough of a revelation.

But it wasn't. It isn't.

Kyungsoo smiles a little, feeling dumb at the reason why he doesn't want his new couch on the same spot where his old couch were displayed.

It's because he doesn't want to see that corner part of the ceiling. It was the spot he used to stare at whenever he was cuddling with Jongin. It was the same spot he was staring too whenever orgasm hits him as Jongin trembled underneath him.

Kyungsoo wonders, if he only told Jongin his feelings instead of making him think that he's a booty call. If he only took chances after chances, not taking his time for being too restful because Jongin was so willing to be there, being available for too many times...

Kyungsoo wonders if he only took a big leap..

Maybe, Jongin would be here. He would be happy knowing that Kyungsoo finally, finally bought a new and much better couch. Instead of enjoying a new found affection from a guy named Sehun who apparently is much better at communicating his feelings than Kyungsoo could ever be.

And as if on a roll to prove his idiocy, he takes his phone, and types a forbidden message to a forbidden contact _to contact_.

' **I bought a couch today. It was expensive. But** **it's** **better than the other one.** '

He then hits send, not spending too much time at the name ' _Jongin_ ' on middle top of his smartphone screen.

Even if sleep never visits Kyungsoo that night, he doesn't bother checking if Jongin replied or not. It doesn't matter anymore.

•

The next morning, opening his phone messages is the first thing Kyungsoo does, forgetting his idiocy last night.

He stares. And breathes deep and hard upon seeing the only message he received.

' **That's** **good** , **hyung**. 🙂'

"Fuck.." Kyungsoo whispers, voice trembling in between chuckles.

He doesn't bother replying.

**Author's Note:**

> Will you all still accept me here? 😢 I miss you all 😭


End file.
